And the Worst Mom in the World Award Goes to. . .

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My daughter goes to a preschool that we can’t really afford.  It is the best in the state and it is driving us deep into debt to send her there.  My son went there too.  It is a long story, but we have committed to keeping her there for another year until she is ready for Kindergarten.

Instead of the regular school photos that most places do, which are expensive already in my opinion, my daughter’s school has a private boutique photographer come in to do photos of the children.  And these photos cost the equivalent of a flight to the moon, in my opinion.

Most of the other parents are doctors and lawyers and business people who can afford such tom foolery.

We have skipped on the photos for the past two years, but for some reason my hubs decided that we would go for it this time around.

So we paid the sitting fee and then completely forgot about it.

My husband sent me a picture of my daughter standing by her cubby in a pair of leopard-print leggings that were ripped in the knee, a mis matched top, and her fine, curly hair completely unbrushed.

She was glaring at his camera phone with glassy, annoyance because I had also sent her to school sick.

Beneath this photo, read my husband’s simple text:  Photo Day.

I wanted to cry.

Not only had I sent my poor little ragamuffin to school sick, but I sent her dressed like something out of a Charles Dickens story on picture day.

This is the crap that makes me feel totally out of control of my life.

This is the crap that makes me feel like I am juggling furiously, but the balls still keep dropping everywhere, and then I am tripping over them in an attempt to gather them all together again.

I went off to work feeling sad, mad, overwhelmed.  I ran a red light in my distraction and I’m pretty sure my transgression was caught in the flashes of a traffic camera.

It all made me want to cry.

Sure a good laugh was had by all the other working moms at work, who let me know they had done the same, exact thing at one point or another.

I still wanted to cry.

The other day, I wrote about about losing our shit as moms, and how we need to practice self acceptance and self compassion in our day to day, so that it will be there for others.

Ever notice how things are so much easier blogged than done?

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11 responses »

  1. Don’t beat yourself up about it, you didn’t do anything wrong on purpose! Moms are human after all and can forget stuff just like everyone else..

  2. Don’t be too hard on yourself, girl. My kid always looks ridock in his school photos too, because he chooses some wonky shirt and he always needs a haircut and we never brush his hair, picture day or not. But sorry you are feeling out of control with this stuff. It’s the worst. xo

    • This comment rocks. I actually think it’s important for our little ones sense of self to dress themselves however they feel good and comfortable. But yeah sometimes these things do get to me and make me feel vulnerable. They ended of doing her picture the next day. So alls well that ends well!! Xox

  3. When my son has his Year 2 pictures, the teacher had combed his hair and put gel in it. I mean, it made him look cute for the pictures, but it totally reminded me of Calvin & Hobbes picture days, because my kid is the fluffy curly haired kid, and trying to gel it into a side part is just ridiculously funny to me.

    Most recently I sent him to school in orange on St. Patrick’s day. I get there and am like “weird, why are all these kids dressed in green.” Hubs just said I should tell them it’s because we’re proud Protestants. HA!

    The only unfortunate thing about your story is that you paid a buttload of money for those pictures. The rest? Totes normal. Sick ragamuffins are the story of our life.

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